santa and banta SMS

Funny Coversation between santa and banta

Santa: What'z da name of ur car?
Banta: I dont know bt it startz with "T"
Santa: Kamal ay yaar tayri gaddee tea naal start hundee hy, apni ty Petrol naal start hundee hey.

Santa, Swimming pool and lady

Officer Santa: Madam swimming is restricted in this lake.
Lady: why didn't you tell me when I was removing my CLOTHES?
Officer Santa: Removing clothes is not restricted.

Funny Coversation between santa and banta

Santa asks banta - What is diffrence between
1. Girlfriend
2. Lover
3. Wife
4. Stepny

Banta said d ansr s very very simple
1. Prepaid
2. Lifetime
3. Postpaid
4. Coinbooth

Funny Coversation between santa and banta

Santa: What'z da name of ur car?
Banta: I dont know bt it startz with "T"
Santa: Kamal ay yaar tayri gaddee tea naal start hundee hy, apni ty Petrol naal start hundee hey.

Funny Coversation between santa and teacher

Teacher: is line ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gya.
Santa: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan....

Funny Coversation between santa and tourist

Santa went to mysore palace.

Tourist guide - santaji plz dont sit there, its Tipu sultan's chair
Santa - oye dont worry yaar i'll get up wen he'll come here.!!..

santa and his wife - funny sms

Santa: Agar tumhe kuch ho gaya to mein Pagal ho jaaunga.
Wife: Doosri shaadi to nahin karogey?
Santa: Pagal ka kya hai, kuch bhi kar sakta hai

Funny Coversation between santa and tourist

Santa: banta yeh AUTOMATICALLY kya hota hai?
Banta: oye tenu eh v nhi pata Santa. dear jab auto main koi ganji ladki ja
rahi ho to usse kehte hain AUTO-ME-TAKLI.

Akal badhi ya bhains - a funny sms

Q: A Man asked Santa, "Akal badhi ya bhains? "
A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."

Nurse and Santa - funny jokes

Nurse: Congrats Santa ji, aap papa ban gaye.
Santa: Meri wife ko nahi bolna mein use surprise dunga!

Petrol ka rate - funny jokes

Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda.
Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."

Santa and Sadhu - a funny conversation

Banta ek sadhu se bola: Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai,
koi upay batao.
Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?

Santa and dog's tail

Santa was inserting dog's tail into pipe.
Banta: Oye, kutte ki dum kabhi seedhi nahi hoti.
Santa: Idiot, main to pipe bend kar raha hoon.

what do you call a deaf person

Teacher : what do you call a person who cannot hear
banta : you can call him whatever you want he cant hear anyway...

Santa in the plane first time

Santa 1st time plane me baitha.
Plane runway pe chal raha tha.
Tabhi Santa ne pilot ko SLAP mara aur bola:
Sale, mai Late ho raha hun aur tu By road ja raha hai?

Santa buying underwear

Santa goes to buy a underwear. On choosing one he asks: How much for this?
Shopkeeper: Rs 500
Santa: Arey bhai daily waer dikhaao,
Party wear nahin chahiye

Santa and college girls

santa-agar main nariyal k ped par chad jaau to engineering colleg ki ladkiyan dikh jayengi
banta-fir hath chod dena to medical college ki bhi dikh jayengi

Santa's Chatri

Santa ki chhatri me chhed tha,
Banta : chhed kyun hain?
Santa : baarish rukegi to pata kaise chalega!

Santa and dudh pilati aurat..

Bus Me 1 Aurat Bacche ko ApNa Dudh Pilate Huye bolti hain - Peele, Nahi to Uncle ko de DunGi!
SANTA : OYE, Jaldi Decide kar!Tere Chakkar Me 5 stop Aage Aa Gya Hoon!

Banta and mobile marriage bureau

Banta: Hamne Mobile Marriage Bureau shuru kiya hai: Rishtey k liye 1 dabaye,
Mangni k liye 2 dabye, Shadi k liye 3 dabye.

Desi Man: Hum Dusri Shadi k liye kya dabaun?
Banta: Dusri shadi k liye pehle wali ka gala dabye ..!

Santa banta and birla cement

Santa : Marte Waqt Aadmi ko Kya dena chahiye ?
Banta : Birla Cement
Santa : Kyun?
Banta : Kyoki iss Cement me jaan Hai.

Thief in banta's home

Santa- kaha ja rahe ho?
Banta- Police Station, Mere ghar chor aya he
Santa- BV ko akela chod dia
Banta- Nhi, usne chor ko baho me jakad rakha hai.

Banta and mujrawaali

Banta mujra dekhne gaya, saari raat mujra dekha
mujrewaali boli saab humne aapko khush kiya ab aap humhe khush kijiye
banta utha aur nachne laga

Banta and air hostess

Banta saw an air hostess wearing a badge on d left side of her chest bearing d name TINA... He said, Thats cute... Whatve u named d other one?...

20 saal bad bachha

Banta k ghar shadi k 20 saal bad bachcha hua,
Wo udas ho gya, santa: Yar udas kyu ho?
bunta: 20 saal bad bachha hua wo bhi,

CHHOTA SA

Santa banta and chess

Santa Banta chess khel rahe the..
joke doesnt end here!!
Santa: yaar hum khel band karte hai.
Banta: thik hai, waise bhi tera ghoda aur mera hathi hi bacha hai..

Santa and future tense

Teacher: I killed a person convert this sentence into future tense.
Santa: The future tense is You will go to jail.

Banta and ice rate - funny jokes

Banta baraf ka tukra lekar gaur se dekh raha tha.
Kisi ne kaha, Kya kar rahe ho

banta - dekh raha hu ki kaha se lick ho raha hain.....

Risk of aids

Santa, Banta n Ghanta Talking Abut Aids
1st: Me To Condom K Bina Krta Nhi
2nd: Me To Ungli Me B Phenta Hu
3rd. Me To Risk Nhi Leta Padosise Krvata Hu.

Santa and his family in the trip to south India

After making a trip of South India , Santa his wife and his son were returning to punjab in Tamilnadu Express. Santa was occupying the lower berth, his wife the middle berth and his son the top most berth in the train. When the train stopped at one of the stations on the way back the son requested Santa to bring him a cup of Ice cream to which Santa readily agreed. When Santa and his son returned they found that a South Indian who couldnt understand hindi had occupied his sons birth . Outraged, Santa called the TT and asked him to help. TT requested that he could not understand Hindi/Punjabi so it would be better if Santa explained the whole situation to him in English. Santa Singh explained, That man sleeping on top of my wife is not giving birth to my child.

Chandigarh and Ayodhya

Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya

Santa was removing a wheel from his auto

Santa was busy removing a wheel from his auto.
A man asks Santa why are you removing a wheel from your auto.
Santa : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.

Santa on railway track

Santa: standing on platform suddenly jumps on railway track.
Man: marega kya?
Santa: Saale marega to tu,
suna nahi train platform pe aa rahi hai.

Santa and Hijade

2 Hijade ek shaadi ki badhai dene gaye.
Haye haye main to 1100 lungi.
Dusri Boli main to 2100 lungi.
Peeche se Santa bola Abey 2310 le lo usme FM bhi hai!!!

Mai jaa raha hu

Santa ask to Banta:
I am Going Iska Kya matalab hota hai
Banta: Mai ja raha hu
Santa: Abe ruk pahle bata fir ja..

Banta writing slowly

Santa was writing something very slowly.
Friend ask: Why r u writing so slowly?
Santa: Im writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he cant read very fast.

Dont use mobile here

Santa petrol pump gya, wahan usne aik board pe likha dekha
"Dont Use mobile here"
Santa G ny mobile nikala or har dost phone kar k kaha
"Dont Call Me Now!

Santa and cop

Santa was riding on a horse.
He jumped the red light & a cop whistles.
Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: 'Le Karle Number Note'

Banta and Lady Teacher

LadyTeacher: write a sentence ending with hand.
Banta: My penis in ur hand. Teacher slapped Banta.
Santa: Sorry mam, I 4got 2 put space betwn PEN IS.

Teacher to santa

Teacher to santa :- aisi kisi jagah ka naam batao jise banaya
to Aadmi Ne hai par phir bhi wo waha ja nahi sakta ?
Santa : "ladies toilet"

20 saal bad bachha

Banta k ghar shadi k 20 saal bad bachcha hua,
Wo udas ho gya, santa: Yar udas kyu ho?
bunta: 20 saal bad bachha hua wo bhi,

CHHOTA SA

Santa banta and chess

Santa Banta chess khel rahe the..
joke doesnt end here!!
Santa: yaar hum khel band karte hai.
Banta: thik hai, waise bhi tera ghoda aur mera hathi hi bacha hai..

Santa and future tense

Teacher: I killed a person convert this sentence into future tense.
Santa: The future tense is You will go to jail.

Banta and ice rate - funny jokes

Banta baraf ka tukra lekar gaur se dekh raha tha.
Kisi ne kaha, Kya kar rahe ho

banta - dekh raha hu ki kaha se lick ho raha hain.....

Risk of aids

Santa, Banta n Ghanta Talking Abut Aids
1st: Me To Condom K Bina Krta Nhi
2nd: Me To Ungli Me B Phenta Hu
3rd. Me To Risk Nhi Leta Padosise Krvata Hu.

Damn funny Santa banta jokes

After making a trip of South India , Santa his wife and his son were returning to punjab in Tamilnadu Express. Santa was occupying the lower berth, his wife the middle berth and his son the top most berth in the train. When the train stopped at one of the stations on the way back the son requested Santa to bring him a cup of Ice cream to which Santa readily agreed. When Santa and his son returned they found that a South Indian who couldnt understand hindi had occupied his sons birth . Outraged, Santa called the TT and asked him to help. TT requested that he could not understand Hindi/Punjabi so it would be better if Santa explained the whole situation to him in English. Santa Singh explained, That man sleeping on top of my wife is not giving birth to my child.

Chandigarh and Ayodhya

Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya

Santa was removing a wheel from his auto

Santa was busy removing a wheel from his auto.
A man asks Santa why are you removing a wheel from your auto.
Santa : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.

Santa on railway track

Santa: standing on platform suddenly jumps on railway track.
Man: marega kya?
Santa: Saale marega to tu,
suna nahi train platform pe aa rahi hai.

Bank robbed

Gang of Santa-Banta broke a bank, but instead of cash they find
bottles of chilled red wine...
happily they drink and left
next day headline

-Braking News-

"Blood Bank Robbed"

Keemti samaan

Santa: Ghar ka saara keemti samaan chhupa ke rakh do,
mere dost aa rahe hain.
Santa's Wife : Kyon! Aapke dost chura lengey?
Santa: Nahin, pehchan lengey.

Santa Banta funny sms

Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication.
Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman.

Santa Banta and laughing buddha

Santa k ghar
Navjot sing siddhu ki tasvir lagi hui thi,
Banta : yeh kyu laga rakkhi hai?
Santa : laughing buddha lene gaya tha,
dukandar ne kaha yeh latest hain...

Kanjus santa and banta

Kanjus Santa : I went 4 my honeymoon alone & saved half the money.

Banta : tht's nothing.. I saved all my money, my friend was going
& I sent my wife with him...